Hawaii may be different due to its size but in general household solar output is just a drop in the bucket compared to all the other power feeds into a grid. The utilities could easily reduce some of the other inputs to prevent the runaway, out of control, solar input destroying their grid.
Also solar is generated where it is consumed. If i am producing solar electricity and there are 10 houses in my street that aren't, then anything i produce is going to be gobbled up by those houses with near zero distribution losses. Instead of the utilities producing 2kw to sell 1kw they buy 2kw from me and get to sell 2kw to whoever wants it.
It may be different elsewhere but here in Australia the utility buys the electricity from solar at 8c/kwh and sell it as green electricity at near 40c/kwh. Considering the near zero distribution loss i fail to see what they have to complain about.
Our grid also has load leveling units. Basically a roadside cabinet chock a block full of batteries that charge up during periods of excess grid power and feed back in when the grid is running short of power. Not sure how many they have installed but it makes sense.
How about letting private consumers host their own load levelers. Put a sizeable bank of batteries in your garage, charge them up on off-peak power for 15c/kwh and then feed that back into the grid during peak demand times and get paid 30c/kwh? Saves the utilities the cost of installing them themselves.