[Fat Charlie]

Anyone can piss in a bottle, even with the regular sized openings (after you mess it up the first time you'll never mess it up again. Luckily, things dry fast in the desert).

A friend of mine had a driver who was completely worthless. Not 10 minutes out of a fuel stop on the way to Baghdad he had to do significantly more than just piss. My friend started yelling at him, basically "You want me to get on the radio and tell them that we have to stop this whole convoy out here because you didn't want to go back at Cedar like everyone else?" He threw an empty Gatorade bottle at him and told him to go in that.

He did.

Wearing a helmet and vest, driving an uparmored Humvee in a convoy on the highway, he crapped in a Gatorade bottle while his boss in the next seat was yelling at him to not mess up his truck. We used Gatorade as his new callsign for a week until our platoon sergeant made us stop. What he never understood was that we actually got some respect for him because of the whole thing.