Sorry, but it sounds like you ARE an ass!
Probably left your battery on charge every time you used wall current...
Probably thought Dell gives a damn about your implied threats...
When you get a new li-ion battery, be smart this time, instead of being an ass, and remove your battery when you don't need it! Run a UPS instead!
That said, the M1330 is the worst lappy Dell ever made (of course they don't make ANY computers, but that's a separate story) but the marketing was GREAT!
That's Dell's fault, not yours...
Sooo... you're an ass and a sucker!
Sorry if I sound rude, but YOU asked - and I don't *feel* like beating around the bush tonight!
I hope you made a better choice in vehicles - didn't look at what you drive before typing this...
EDIT
Oops... you bought a Yaris - the Toyota equivalent of a Dell M1330. Good luck in life - you need it!!! I wish you all the best...