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You can get a tow hitch with a 3000lb weight rating for an Avalon hybrid that get's 40mpg according to the EPA.
(Although 3,000lbs is admittedly very excessive for a 3,500lb car that Toyota doesn't even want you to tow with. I don't tow more than 1,000lbs in mine.)
Toyotas/Lexus may be more reliable, but not necessarily less expensive in the long run. IIRC Consumer Reports said that Ford truck (maybe also SUV) owners are keeping their vehicles longer than Toyotas because the parts and repairs are cheaper.
Very rarely is AWD/4WD ever necessary. It's just a convenience once every other year so you don't have to get out and put some sand or branches in front of the tires. Just having the right tires is all you need, and unlike AWD better tires also help you brake.
The people that benefit most from AWD/4WD are those who have long driveways where it snows a lot and don't want to have to deal with proper snow removal.
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