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I can relate to your situation. My mother and dad had a variety of medical issues over the years. In large part they were able to take care of one another, with my sister and I stepping in occasionally. Once they neared 90 years of age things got tougher for them and they moved into an 'independent living' complex; meals were made for them, cleaning and laundry taken care of, emergency call buttons handy with 24x7 in-house response. It was not their greatest desire but it served them well for 6+ years. Even so we were spending a lot of time in hospitals for this and that.
Then COVID happened and their facility went into a pretty strict lockdown. It worked in terms of keeping residents safe from the pandemic but I think it took other physical and mental tolls. I took over their shopping regimen, handing their packages in through an intermediary and only seeing them through a glass door, for 8 months. My sister couldn't even see them at all unless she violated restrictions, because she lives in another state. It was tough being separated from them for so long.
Shortly after restrictions eased, my dad's heart finally called it quits last October. We couldn't have a proper service due to the pandemic but managed to get a few folks together. My duties increased to include doing the financial stuff for mom in addition to the rest. At least I could get in to see her! Then she wound up in the hospital for a relatively minor thing, but suffered a stroke while there. She went this past August.
They both had long, eventful lives filled with love and family so that was good. Doesn't make me miss them any less.
My wife's son also died, from COVID, at age 49. At Christmastime. His wife refused to let any of the family visit or even be informed of his condition during the weeks he fought the virus, which is one of the cruelest things I have ever personally witnessed. We still don't know what has become of his remains.
It's been a stressful, busy, loss-filled time. Getting near 2 years of this. It's nuts.
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