[slowmover]

This wife is a problem. Explain that it’s an emotional thing, that she can not only get around it, but feel more confident in driving as well.

Example: one DOES NOT drive a particular speed. One drives to conditions within upper & lower limits. How others around me are doing it isn’t relevant to my responsibilities. . Lesson: show how bad are the other drivers as they are ALWAYS too close to the next vehicle. Even at a stoplight. One should be able to start moving the moment the light changes green even if seven cars back. And one could IF drivers could ALWAYS SEE the pavement between them and that next vehicle.

Thus, the stopping point isn’t the next cars bumper, it’s about twenty feet back. And then a slight roll forward that preserves that space. A full stop is thus necessary quite a ways back. One is rolling only a good ways before that.

One NEVER crosses the real or imputed intersection line when at a stop. In fact, one stops well behind it to avoid being pushed into the intersection by another vehicle (metro area fatalities are of this type).

Another: one is into the right or exit lane a mile or more ahead of last-moment need. Same for left lane turns.

My mother was also hard on brakes. One was either ON throttle or ON brake. The feedback is that as the car approaches cruise (which is NOT the limit, not even a chosen number) one backs down in acceleration rate. Allows the vehicle to ease into those last mph.

Burdened as we’ve become with tens of millions of retarded or just above retarded IQ “citizens” for whom driving safely is past their abilities, driving needs a plan. They cut in with no room, they act as if they have ROW when they don’t, and can’t be expected to follow even the simplest rules.

Never the last moment I HAVE TO GO must be eliminated. Driving has a ceremonial aspect. A visualization of best route. Best time. Etc.
Errands combined. Clean glass, etc. As husband my part is a weekly fillup, wash and inspection. It’s not optional. Same for the service schedule and dealing with those men. Act.

A woman is not naturally at home behind the wheel. That needs context that husband , father, etc, provides. Get her attention by hypothesizing a situation based on current bad habits that kills her beloved Daddy or puts her child in a wheelchair.

When I met my ex she was having a spate of fender-benders and minor tickets. We got that changed. Our son the hotshot military pilot reports that she’s impressive nowadays with a V8 BMW X5 with all the bells. She’s also married to a rich guy into vintage racing. Naturally good she was, but context was missing about start-stop-roll. A plan. And a husband who treated her car and her driving as precious to him.

Instruction HOW to drive is also a monkey skill. My big boat of a 1970s Chrysler was no match for her Lexus. But as I could outdrive her, that got her attention: no braking into a turn. I was accelerating away at an earlier point. Etc.

The “stupid” are generally predictable. Being smarter and being able to use that gets rid of the feeling of being in a trap. Knowing the rules.

Tires and brakes should last 70k, not 35. Major evidence for better operation. From which FE will follow.

There is fun in the acquisition of skill, not just (damned) rules.

A feedback device such as Scangauge is also appropriate.

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