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Xist 08-09-2013 03:07 PM

Alone again, naturally.
So, I am thirty-four, and still unmarried. Sometimes people give me the benefit of the doubt and ask "Still haven't found the right one?" Honestly, it is within the realm of possibility that I was not the "right one." I have seen and tried to learn from different trends, but I just had a new experience.

A girl whose career was more important than I was.

I really liked her.

gone-ot 08-09-2013 04:04 PM

...just remember the old fisherman's metaphor: "...there are LOTs more fish in the sea..."

UltArc 08-09-2013 07:04 PM

Better to be unmarried, than married and unhappy. I could only speculate on "advice" but I think it's universal to suggest meeting new people, you never know who the next person you meet will be :)

(That said, watch out for serial killers-you never know who the next person you meet will be :/ )

I hope you find what you're looking for, sir.

Frank Lee 08-09-2013 07:51 PM

Pets are better- far more forgiving and reliable.

user removed 08-09-2013 08:21 PM

Didn't get married until I was 3 weeks shy of 39, to a gal who was my next door neighbor when we were both teenagers. She looked like (and still does) Anette Funicello's sister. Sadly Anette is having aa rough time.

I have no children of my own. Didn't think the world had much longer to exist when you watch Kruschev on TV saying "We will bury you".

Not even sure how I would go about finding a partner today. Younger brother got divorced when she insisted he "get religion". He got a six pack, she got gone.

Look at it like this. In the span of 120 years the life expectancy in the US has gone from 42 to close to 80. You have a lot of time left to find someone, just don't push it or you could end up in worse shape.


Xist 08-10-2013 11:57 AM

Thanks, guys.

I have done a lot of Internet dating over the years and I am not sure that I have done worse there than with girls that I met in-person, but this girl was the first one that I met in-person in years.

When I was coming home from Germany, I kept telling myself that I was not going to do any more on-line dating, I wanted to meet everyone in person.

That would be great, but I do not necessarily have much in common with my nineteen year-old classmates, and I always felt that I needed to study more, so I really did not go out.

The thing is, years ago I dated a girl that was an engineer. We had the best nerd conversations! However, she was the only one that I have dated that I actually felt had a career. Everyone else goes from one job to another, whatever they can find.

The largest free dating site is called Plenty of Fish. There are lots of weirdos on there! :D

Fat Charlie 08-12-2013 09:17 AM

Two of my friends who got into horrible marriages 15-20 years ago finally wound up getting hitched this summer to good people. They didn't find the right matches by trying too hard, but by being willing to settle for staying single rather than make colossal mistakes again. It took years, but it worked out well for them.

RedDevil 08-12-2013 12:01 PM

Got married at 40. Became a dad at 43.
I'm happy, but I'm also happy having had a lot of time on my hands to do things I like before this all. I now measure free time in minutes.

If you have a job and want to keep on spending hours per day on modding your car or any hobby at all, better stay clear of the other sex. :)

SentraSE-R 08-12-2013 12:31 PM

You'v got plenty of time. I had a girlfriend who is literally worth a million dollars, DD cups & a 25" waist, charming & pleasant, who didn't marry until she was 70. The guy she married is in her age range, and it was his first marriage, too.

Smurf 08-12-2013 12:59 PM

I'm with ya Xist. My mother, father, and older sister have a combined 11 divorces between them. After age 9, I grew up without parents, literally. Nearly everyone in my hometown had children by age 20.

Now, I'm 28, I've been with a girl from my high school class for over 3 not-great-but-definitely-not-miserable years, and neither of us have children or any intention of getting married. How my father deserted me and my sister made me realize that unless I'm fully ready, capable, and willing to be a father, I cannot and should not risk repeating his mistakes to any offspring of my own.

To each their own, honestly. Everyone has their own path, their own decisions to make along that path, their own rewards and/or consequences of those decisions. If you're thinking that perhaps you yourself are "not the right one", that only means that you're unique as hell and it'll take someone truly special to make you want to settle. In no way is that a bad thing!

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