*cue the 21 gun salute*
SCarlett, may you rest in pieces.
She met her end tonight as I was leaving Minneapolis on my way home. I approached the MN 36 and Snelling Avenue cloverleaf to find myself getting frisky with a doe whitetail.
Now to put this into context, there is a shopping mall on both sides of the highway, in addition to D. O. T. office buildings and several apartment buildings. It is
just barely beyond the city limits of Minneapolis, and skyscraper laden downtown is 2 minutes away. You're much more likely to hit a Starbucks double mocha latte than a deer in this part of town, and yet, thats just what I did.
I was traveling westbound on MN36 in the slow lane at 50 mph when the deer trotted onto the road. I stomped on the clutch and brake which locked the wheels, initiating a slide. I've spent so much time trying not to hit drunkards downtown that my reaction to a thing in the road was to avoid hitting it (just hit the deer, people). So I steered left, and with locked wheels had no grip. I
almost pulled out of the maneuver but I got too far over in the fast lane and caught gravel, and that was all she wrote folks.
I made the mistake of trying to steer back onto the roadway, causing SCarlett to tilt on the drivers side. She rolled over and skidded to a stop on the roof, in the median.
As soon as the world stopped spinning, I shut the engine off. I checked my limbs to make sure everything was attached and checked that I had no pain in my neck or back. Then I looked around to make sure there were no fluids leaking from the car. Finding none left me to figure out how the hell to get out of my seat. I grasped the wheel and unclicked the seat-belt, sort of flopping down onto my left side. The door, being buried in the dirt, was jammed shut. I resorted to shimmying out the broken driver's window with the help of two gentleman who risked their lives crossing two lanes of freeway traffic. They had me sit in the median while an off duty paramedic and her friends rushed up to examine me. The Troopers arrived in minutes followed by an ambulance and fire truck, both of which were thankfully not needed.
After the paramedics patched up a laceration on my shin and a couple on my noggin', I was left to watch the wrecker load up SCarlett. I have no idea how they got her upright, but they did. The car was hauled to my dad's workshop and I'll try to borrow a trailer from work to haul it home. In the meantime, I'll have to dust off Angila Taurus, who has been doing a fine job of adding iron to the soil in my yard for the past several months.
Look for SCarlett to be reincarnated in
Fantastic Plastic Part II: The EV Saga
Check your oil, wear your seat-belts, and have a fine night,
~Jimbo
Today
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