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Old 04-29-2012, 11:26 PM   #1 (permalink)
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For Your Punography Collection

I changed my iPod's name to Titanic. It's syncing now.

When chemists die, they barium.

Jokes about German sausage are the wurst.

I know a guy who's addicted to brake fluid. He says he can stop any time.

How does Moses make his tea? Hebrews it.

I stayed up all night to see where the sun went. Then it dawned on me.

This girl said she recognized me from the vegetarian club, but I'd never met herbivore.

I'm reading a book about anti-gravity. I just can't put it down.

I did a theatrical performance about puns. It was a play on words.

They told me I had type-A blood, but it was a Type-O.

PMS jokes aren't funny; period.

Why were the Indians here first? They had reservations.

We are going on a class trip to the Coca-Cola factory. I hope there's no pop quiz.

I didn't like my beard at first. Then it grew on me.

Did you hear about the cross-eyed teacher who lost her job because she couldn't control her pupils?

When you get a bladder infection urine trouble.

Broken pencils are pointless.

I tried to catch some fog, but I mist.

What do you call a dinosaur with an extensive vocabulary? A thesaurus.

England has no kidney bank, but it does have a Liverpool.

I used to be a banker, but then I lost interest.

I dropped out of communism class because of lousy Marx.

All the toilets in New York's police stations have been stolen. The police have nothing to go on.

I got a job at a bakery because I kneaded dough.

Haunted French pancakes give me the creapes.

Velcro - what a rip off!

A cartoonist was found dead in his home. Details are sketchy

Venison for dinner again? Oh deer!

The earthquake in Washington obviously was the government's fault.

Be kind to your dentist. He has fillings, too.

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Old 04-29-2012, 11:40 PM   #2 (permalink)
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Love that stuff. Where did you find all that?
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Old 04-29-2012, 11:49 PM   #3 (permalink)
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A friend emailed it to me, I found it so amusing I thought it should see a little air time.
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Old 04-30-2012, 10:48 AM   #4 (permalink)
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How do Nazis kill off a race of robots? They use ze aus-switch!
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Old 04-30-2012, 11:14 AM   #5 (permalink)
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Quote:
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How do Nazis kill off a race of robots? They use ze aus-switch!
Nazi jokes are in poor taste Anne Frankly I don't think they're funny.
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Old 04-30-2012, 11:07 PM   #6 (permalink)
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Nazi jokes ? they're out of Mein Kampfert zone.

:-)
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Old 05-01-2012, 02:55 AM   #7 (permalink)
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You schutzstaffel that right now. Someone might get offended. It's just not reich to make those jokes.
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Old 05-01-2012, 11:19 AM   #8 (permalink)
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Quote:
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You schutzstaffel that right now. Someone might get offended. It's just not reich to make those jokes.
I did Nazi that coming. If you keep it up you will feel the Fuhrer of the moderators.
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Old 05-01-2012, 11:52 AM   #9 (permalink)
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I saw a Frisbee which kept getting bigger and bigger. At first I didn't understand, but then it hit me.
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Old 05-01-2012, 11:59 AM   #10 (permalink)
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