Alone again, naturally.

[Frank Lee]

That's mucho CHEAPER too.

[cRiPpLe_rOoStEr]

Getting in a rush to find a marriage is not exactly a wise choice. Well, nowadays a marriage contract doesn't seem to mean anything anymore.

[Xist]

Originally Posted by cRiPpLe_rOoStEr

Getting in a rush to find a marriage is not exactly a wise choice. Well, nowadays a marriage contract doesn't seem to mean anything anymore.

Yes, I have tried explaining those to married women several times...

I guess that I am a "Grass is Greener" type of guy.

I would really rather not be!

[Occasionally6]

Originally Posted by Xist

That would be great, but I do not necessarily have much in common with my nineteen year-old classmates, and I always felt that I needed to study more, so I really did not go out.

Dude, you have 19 year old classmates and you are not taking advantage of that!? You don't have to be some creepy 'old guy', just enjoy the experience and make sure they do too.

There is no "one" for anyone. There are many potential life partners, each will have good and bad attributes and each will be a different experience. No partnership is perfect and even a good partnership has its ups and downs.

Keep looking.

[bestclimb]

I have a friend in his early 50s. Wife left him for a guy she met on the internet in some other country about 8 years ago. I listened for years about how he was going to be alone for ever, then he stopped worrying about it quite as much (he still kept a line in the water and an eye out) Anyway, I stood up for him at a lovely little ceremony a few months back. Yea they are both older, they both "settled" but I think things are pretty happy with their choice.

Also I would have to echo about taking advantage of connections made in classes. As long as there is a compatible level of maturity, there's not a thing in the world wrong with it. If you are there for the classes you won't be a creepy old guy.

"I go for younger women, lived with several a while, though I ran them away they'd come back one day and still could manage to smile..."

[redpoint5]

My life plan was to retire wealthy and relatively healthy at the age of 55, marry a 25 year old, and begin my family (since I can't fathom how anyone has time for children unless they are retired). Well... I got married last week at the age of 32. My wife ruined my plan, and I couldn't be more contented.

Plenty of Fish is garbage. I found my wife on OKCupid (and my wife's friend found her husband at the same time on the same site). The matching algorithm is superior to others because it allows your own opinions on any number of things to form the matches, instead of relying on some stuffy old "expert" to apply a simplistic formula. It's free too.

A few years back I met an extraordinary 18 year old girl at junior college; I was 28. I had my reservations about dating her, and even shared them with the girl, but in her naivety she persisted and against my better judgement I gave in. When she went away to the University and broke up with me, it really hurt. I guess my only point is that even though you might feel older, young women are attracted to guys that are fun and represent a source of security, regardless of age.

Getting rejected by someone we love is the worst because we always pine for the one that got away, or the one that we can't quite get. There is nothing I know of that will heal the heart faster, but it's important to know in your mind that genuine and enduring love and companionship meet on the same level, with the same commitment. If a girl leaves, then it is better than having her hang on by a thread while you devote yourself to her.

I commend you on admitting that perhaps you were not the right one. American culture inflates our egos to unhealthy levels by saying we are perfect the way we are, that it's their problem and not a problem with me, and that we deserve the best of everything. The reality is, you only get what you give. Become the man that deserves the woman of your dreams. Perhaps you are, but there is always room for improvement.

And last, as a man, you are likely going to have to make the first confident step in the relationship. If it's meant to be, she will eventually meet you halfway.

[Xist]

Congratulations, Redpoint5!

Originally Posted by redpoint5

young women are attracted guys that are fun and represent a source of security, regardless of age.

I need to be fun?!

Hey guys, thanks for all of the feedback! I have told friends about Plenty of Fish only because of the sheer numbers and I think that it is decent, but I have to wonder about the "matches" that it provides for me, forty at a time!

So, all of these women are alive? Well, that is a start.

A while ago Zoosk advertised on Facebook, saying that a married friend used it. I asked her about it, but she refused to answer, so I tried to find her profile, and then she told me that when she realized that it was a dating site, she deleted her page. Zoosk sends me a scientific match every day. Really? Based on what data?

The one site that I have actually used with hopes of finding someone, is specifically for people with whom I hopefully have more in common.

It is always recommending 60-80 year-old women.

No...

Funny how the one that I liked the best, I met in person.

Take care, everybody!

[euromodder]

Originally Posted by Xist

So, I am thirty-four, and still unmarried.

What's the problem ?

A few more years, and ppl will even stop asking

[order99]

I'm currently 45, single and never married-and I can count the number of relationships, long term and otherwise(and including a single 'one-night stand' ending in mutual embarrassed good humor), on the fingers of one hand and still have a thumb. I am alone.

I am not, and will possibly never be, lonely. I have family and friends both male and female, and while I lack what many consider a 'full' social life it is because:

A) I am too busy trying to survive in today's economy and meeting my self-imposed obligations to Church, Family and lifelong friends, and
B) I am a picky and prickly SOB with no tolerance for melodrama.

In my life so far, I have met three women whom I considered worth proposing marriage to:

One was taken from us far too soon to join the Kingdom of Heaven.
One chose the prospect of a high-pace career involving constant nationwide mobility(theater) and I had neither the temperament or talent to follow...I watched her leave with barely a tear, because I do not believe that real love should be selfish.
One was of mixed heritage(I refuse to use the term 'Race' since we were both of the Human Race), and her parents took remarkable exception to my inherited Nordic skin, never mind that my family tree has its share of Lumbee, Creole and Hispanic outliers...long story short, I will never come between a woman and her family (no matter what their idiot reasons) because of personal selfishness.

On the other hand, we have my younger (by one year) sister, who was obsessed with finding Mister Right. By the time she was thirty, she had gone into and out of three marriages and several relationships ranging from 'the chemistry isn't there' to 'i'll call the Sheriff if he ever speaks to me again'...and by the ripe old age of 33 she decided that she was 'giving up' on love.

Four months later she met an outwardly unremarkable man at work, and they struck up a platonic, and then a not-so platonic, relationship...and this year we celebrated their 11th wedding anniversary,

You will find that perfect someone (or not) early in life (or late) and die surrounded by loved ones (or alone)...so what? Live in the moment and make contingencies for the future without stressing too hard over possibilities beyond your control, and enjoy it.

Hey, where'd this Soapbox come from?

(adds to collection)

Ten more and I can start my new house!

[freebeard]

Shouldn't you be studying or something? This is the saddest thread I've ever read.

I went through a patch like that when I was about your age and I went to a counselor at the Free Clinic. He ran it down for me and I said "Wait a minute. You're saying that everyone who is in a relationship didn't want/care to be and it was their indifference that opened the door and allowed it to happen?" He said "Precisely".

Now I'm twice you age and in exactly the same position. Let the record show that that counselor was wrong.

Maybe those 19-year-olds have older sisters.