Ecomodder parenting

[freebeard]

Originally Posted by California98Civic

She got a perfect score on a chem test yesterday and it precipitated a conversation between us

[redpoint5]

My sense is that interests are mostly genetically programmed. My parents had no interest in efficiency, technology, or engineering, but I do. My dad is naturally very mechanically inclined, but has no training. Mom; I still don't know what her skill is besides listening.

Let me know all the tips, especially in keeping a girl from losing interest in things other than boys. Mine is 40 hrs old, so I've got some time to figure it out.

[gone-ot]

"Raise PUPPIES not KIDS, because it's not against the law to give away PUPPIES!"

[freebeard]

Let me know all the tips, especially in keeping a girl from losing interest in things other than boys. Mine is 40 hrs old, so I've got some time to figure it out.

OMG, it's starting to sink in. Are you going to make a tickler file that will remind you at each stage along the way? Because it changes all the time.

Where to even start? I would suggest that you learn from her for 2-3 three years and then she learns from you. Your able to influence her until public school starts, then that's over. But your still on the hook until majority.

(Timothy Leary's eight-circuit brain)

At some point you'll need to read to her a lot. I used Godel, Escher, Bach by Hofstader.

Each chapter is college-level stuff but is preceded by a fable that foreshadows the content. I still remember his delight when we got to the middle of the Crab Canon.

One dialogue in the book is written in the form of a crab canon, in which every line before the midpoint corresponds to an identical line past the midpoint. The conversation still makes sense due to uses of common phrases that can be used as either greetings or farewells ("Good day") and the positioning of lines which double as an answer to a question in the next line.

[California98Civic]

Originally Posted by freebeard

... It sounds like you have yourself a Girl Genius.

I just got the Girl Genius reference! Lol. Yes, she is highly focused, until suddenly... distracted. Kid is good at math and chem, loves to dance, has the boys after her, and is skilled in rapid insult trading. I have raised a major multi-dimensional threat. I hope she never turns these powers on dear old Dad.

Originally Posted by redpoint5

... Let me know all the tips, especially in keeping a girl from losing interest in things other than boys. Mine is 40 hrs old, so I've got some time to figure it out.

We had practices but I have few tips. A parent raising a child in like a musician trying to improvise melody over an ever-changing chord progression--with sudden key changes, sometimes as often as you adapt and as immediately. So, I learn from her about who she is becoming, and we talk with her about possible outcomes for choices and about not becoming anyone's tool--boys, schools, employers, or marketers. She is a free girl and nothing valuable is categorically forbidden (unless it is too expensive!). We like to emphasize her ability to do things for herself. We like to demystify things: if she is ready to ask about something, she is ready for a factual answer in language she can understand at whatever age she is.

I don't know. For every great conversation there are tons of blank stares, and a few awful moments. And she always wants more stuff and she always wants a ride...

Ah, parenting!

[jamesqf]

Originally Posted by Old Tele man

"Raise PUPPIES not KIDS, because it's not against the law to give away PUPPIES!"

But I get attached to puppies - my current "Can you just keep him for a week or two so he won't have to go to the (sniffle) pound?" pup is going on 8 now :-)

[jcp123]

Raising kids is hard. If they ask me a question, I try to ask them questions I might ask myself to lead to the answer. Only a few times have I handed them answers on a platter, although with children sometimes you have to be bluntly obvious

My eldest has always tested above average, although I don't place much faith in standardized testing. She was borderline gifted program. The younger one is scrappy and has always reached milestones earlier due to her sister helping her along.

My wife and I are oceans apart on politics and we are in open war over where to live, LOL. But we agree on how to raise children, and we both want to expose them to as much as we can, not hand them answers, and let them be who they are, not who we want them to be.

[California98Civic]

Originally Posted by jcp123

Raising kids is hard. If they ask me a question, I try to ask them questions I might ask myself to lead to the answer. Only a few times have I handed them answers on a platter, although with children sometimes you have to be bluntly obvious

My eldest has always tested above average, although I don't place much faith in standardized testing. She was borderline gifted program. The younger one is scrappy and has always reached milestones earlier due to her sister helping her along.

My wife and I are oceans apart on politics and we are in open war over where to live, LOL. But we agree on how to raise children, and we both want to expose them to as much as we can, not hand them answers, and let them be who they are, not who we want them to be.

I like your questions, not answers approach a lot. We do that often too, to get her thinking, or because we don't know any answers that we'd call TRUTH. But sometimes answers even for "difficult" or "awkward" topics are simpler, like sex questions re: anatomy and stuff like that. If ahe is ready to ask what's what, she needs a flat out, simple answer (I think).

[freebeard]

To [TLDR:] The eight-circuit brain theory of Timothy Leary has four terrestrial circuits. They can be cartooned as infant, family, tribe and nation-state. Literal synaptic circuits.

It's the hardest thing for an adult to 'throttle back' and communicate on a level that excludes politics (& sex). But if you do, then "Group-ups always say the weirdest sh-tuff" goes away and comms can happen.

One for the tickler file: kids can beat grow-ups at pattern-matching games up until the age of maybe four. So if you want to build confidence and competitivness, try pattern matching games.